The pitch / Auger

Get out your checkbook and picture this.

You've got your protagonist, just your modern day, everyday, everyman trying to get by. He's got a wife, couple kids, loyal dog, decent house, job that puts food on the table, so-on-and-so-forth, but there's something missing and he can't put his finger on it. Think Kevin Spacey from 'American Beauty'. 

We'll call him George.

So you take this all American man with his all American family and you toss them into an environment none of them are familiar with. I mean the whole family is out of their element (maybe a vacation gone awry, they slip into another dimension, they're forced to move to a new country for some reason - we'll figure something out). Think 'The Shining' meets 'National Lampoon's Vacation' meets 'An American Tail' - something to that effect.  

Pretty nuts, I know, but stay with me.

Anyway, tragic hijinx ensues. Surrounded by customs, predicaments, and circumstances foreign to his family, George struggles to keep them together. Mother lashes out at child, child looks to father for help, father worries about the well-being of the dog, dog ruins the mother's good shoes - the cycle perpetuates itself. They are all desperate and scared. Things are unravelling at a rapid pace.

Then, as chance would have it, George meets what turns out to be the mirror image of himself from that particular strange world. This guy also has the wife, kids, dog, house, and job. Only difference is we're in his element now. Think Darren McGavin from 'A Christmas Story'. We'll call him Fred. Fred takes George and his family under his wing. He and his family teach them the ways and nuances of this new place. The wife and kids get along famously. Even the dogs take to each other - share the same food bowl or some shit. Both families quickly grow quite find of each other and George finds that one thing we was looking for - a staunch conviction of his ability to be a good father and husband.

At this point we turn the movie on it's head as Fred's family is suddenly faced with the same challenges. Through some sort of crazy set of events (plane crash on a deserted island, apocalyptic scare, they inherit a farm - we'll figure something out) they are thrown into the culture George's family had come from. Now they're the ones surrounded with a foreign way of life. They too, must adapt. Fred finds himself learning the same lessons he helped teach George.  Over time both men find themselves fitting into the lives the other had built.  They take on similar jobs, make the same friends, and share the same pains.  It's fucking beautiful.

Of course at the end everyone somehow makes it back to their original homes and proceed to lead fuller and happier lives.  Wrap it up in a nice pretty bow.

It will challenge everything we think we know about our families, our culture, our government, and ourselves. It will rekindle age-old debates such as nature vs. nurture, separation of church and state, and the key to happiness.
Toss in some cutting edge special effects and I think we have a winner on our hands.

Sounds promising. One problem though. I'm pretty sure that movie's already been made.

Bullshit. You show me one movie that tackles all of that and pulls it off.  I've checked.  Nothing from Landis, Reiner, Solondz, or Raimi.  Not even Ron Howard.

Try Don Lusk.

Who the hell is Don Lusk?

Made a little movie called, 'Jetsons Meet the Flintstones'

Fuck.