Fifty grand / Norman Gentle

Me: If I were to come home with $50,000 in cash what would you say?

Wife: I'd probably ask where you got it.

M: What if I told you not to worry about it.

W: Then we'd have 50K.

M: So you'd be cool with it?

W: Do you have $50,000?

M: No. I'm just asking.

W: Then what's the point?

M: I just want to know that if I come home with a large sum of money you'd be game.

W: Sure. Whatever.

M: Good. See? That's what I'm talking about. . . What if I needed your help getting the money?

W: Getting the money from where?

M: From wherever.

W: What are you talking about?

M: If I had a detailed plan about where to go and what to do and it had all been thought out and all you had to do was watch a door or trip an alarm would you do it?

W: You mean like robbing a bank?

M: Not necessarily. Just any sort of plan to get a lot of money.

W: Illegally?

M: Most likely illegally but there'd be no risk. I'd have the whole thing planned out.

W: No way. You'd get caught.

M: Why would you say something like that?

W: Because you're being stupid.

M: You don't think I could organize a simple little caper of some sort?

W: A fucking bank robbery?

M: Didn't I just say 'not necessarily'? There are plenty of ways to get money for nothing without robbing a bank.

W: Oh yeah? Name one.

M: . . . . . That's not the point. The point is we're both intelligent people, right?

W: Sure.

M: We could do it together. It could be like a whole adventure thing. I'd come up with the plan and make sure it was fail safe. You know, that there'd be no way we'd get caught. I could totally do that. We're not against any sort of time deadline or anything, it's not like we desperately need money right at this second or anything, so I could take my time and do research and look for the perfect opportunity. I'd even do the leg work from public computers or something to keep the whole thing untraceable. Once I pegged our score or whatever I'd work out the details and present them to you so you could review it and ask questions and make sure it was something you felt comfortable with. Hell, we could make a night of it - order some pizza, open a bottle of wine, and go over the plan. How cool would that be? We'd take your feedback and tweak things as necessary and when the big day came we'd work out our alibis with movie tickets or doctored receipts or whatever and we'd pull it off together. Fifty grand! Or however much! We should at least plan it, right? See if we come up with something that looks promising? I mean what do we have to lose?

W: I'm going to bed.

M: OK. I get it. Need to sleep on it. Totally cool. . . . . . . . . . I'll be in in a little bit. I'm gonna work out some of the schematics here, get a head start.
W: You know tomorrow morning we got that brunch thing over at the Conner's place.
M: Oh right. What are their names again?
W: Dave and Stacy.
M: And Dave works at a bank, right?
W: Good night.