Top 21 available domain names* / Sandra Dong

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The coin case / Lonnie Banderson

At my folks' place over the holidays I noticed a wooden case sitting on the bookshelf in the family room. It immediately caught my eye, partly due to its shiny mahogany finish and partly because the bookshelf's prior arrangement of Time Life materials, outdated encyclopedia set, and photo albums hadn't been altered in over 20 years. It was a display case, one for coins, with a glass top, and it didn't have much of anything in it. My mom, who has the habit of lingering no more than four feet from me whenever I come to visit, began to offer an explanation before I had a chance to ask for one.

"It's your father's. It's a display case for his state quarters."

"How come there are only three quarters in there?"

To this she sighed, then hesitated, as if debating whether or not to attempt to defend him.

"He ordered it a couple months ago. You get a new gold-plated state park quarter every week in the mail."

"OK."

"He decided after the first few quarters came that he couldn't afford it so he canceled the thing."

"But he already paid for the display case?"

"Yes. I suppose you had to pay for that upfront. He said he decided it wasn't worth it."

"So now you're going to keep this display case on the bookshelf with only three quarters in it?"

"Well. . ."

"Well what?"

"I told him that was ridiculous - that if he ordered it in the first place he should keep the thing going until he gets all the quarters. He said he didn't care - that it cost too much money and he never should have ordered it in the first place. He was done with it. . . So I called the number the other day and restarted the delivery or whatever. We should start getting the rest of the coins next week."

"So he canceled it and you re-ordered it?"

"Yes."

"Did you tell Dad that you did that?"

"Yes. Let's just say he's not very happy about it."

zeroth life lesson: There can be no better bitter reminder of one's own perpetual stinginess, indecisiveness, and wife's constant undermining than a full set of gold-plated state quarters permanently on display on one's bookshelf under glass in a gorgeous mahogany case.